Elements of Success

Three weeks ago, I attended a professional seminar and was very pleased by the approach of the facilitator on his topic. Although the subject matter was intended for the workplace, the audience appreciated his examples that applied to people’s lives in general. He boldly declared: “Life is all about relationships!” While discussing the 3Ps for success, I was delighted that he added an additional “P” word to the renowned triad of Passion, Practice, and Persistence. He gave this fourth P its very own presentation slide and referred to it as the most important element of success—Prayer.

The facilitator made plenty of jokes during his presentation. I thought he had a good sense of humor, yet beyond his funny stories, there was a lot of truth and wisdom in his statements.

There’s this Primary song about a foolish man building his house upon the sand, and the wise man building his upon the rock. Just as another song says “sand castles fall apart when the tide comes in,” we know that when one puts up his house upon sandy foundation, it won’t be long until it will all get shattered.

Through my life’s experiences, I’ve learned that true success is not measured by anything that the eye can see or the hand can touch, for these things are deceiving. It’s as intangible as a warm feeling when we’ve done something good that made someone else happy; or the peace and contentment that we get when we hear our children’s laughter; or an honest day’s toil whether in the farm or in the office; and a joyful heart after doing what we know is right.

At the end of the day, it all boils down to the knowledge that our efforts had been blessed knowing we did the best we could with whatever it was that our Heavenly Father had entrusted to us.

 

Work, an Eternal Principle

 (Photograph by Franco Advincula)

I got up early this morning thinking about the many things that I need to get done. They just simply keep coming. But I’ve learned to be grateful for these responsibilities when I realized that working—in whatever form—is a privilege.

Work is an eternal gospel principle. Even God worked for six days when this earth was created and rested only on the seventh. In the same manner, we are admonished not to be idle and to use our time wisely (see D&C 88:124). As parents, we are advised to encourage our children to work in the capacity or level that they are able to. We are not doing them any good if we do everything for them. At times we may have to repeat washing the dishes or mopping the floor after they’ve already done it, but it’s the only way we can effectively teach them—by having them practice a skill or task until they can perfect it!

When I was a child, I sometimes resented it when I was asked to do household chores while all my younger brothers and sisters played. I felt like Cinderella as I cleaned the house while their youthful giggles filled the air. There were times I wished that I wasn’t the eldest child in the family.

But as I grew up, I became more and more “proficient” in doing household chores that performing those tasks became natural to me. And now as an adult, I look back and feel grateful that I was given the privilege to learn those chores while I was young for it has blessed my life tremendously. This experience taught me that we don’t have to like everything that we’re working on at the moment, but if we keep at it and learn from it, we will benefit from it in the future.

So, let’s all be grateful for work opportunities and the blessing of being able to work. I think it’s a celestial principle that, if we try to be good at, will bring us immense blessings untold.

Blessing, not Burden…

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

I sat speechless the other day as I listened to someone talk about her thoughts on ending her life due to something that other people would consider a great blessing. Just a few days prior to that incident, someone I knew grieved tremendously for the loss of the very blessing that this person was considering a burden—such a complete contrast of perspective!

I admired the hope in the heart of this acquaintance who suffered a great loss. Despite the deep sorrow she must’ve felt, she acknowledged the miracle of being able to keep her blessing even for a short period of time. I know that her blessing will be restored to her again someday. And I trust that when that day comes, she will receive an even greater blessing for having a grateful heart despite this painful challenge she has faced in life.

On that same week, a rare opportunity was offered to someone I knew who considered the chance as a great privilege; while another felt that it was only an additional load that would add up to this person’s already numerous responsibilities. It was again interesting for me to see such different points of view.

We can see through these instances that there are times when we are given the exact same glass of water, but some of us see it as half-full, while some see it as half-empty.

When I look back at the things that happened in my life, I could see that each phase was a step towards the next. Everything happened for a reason—even the most unpleasant experiences, for they became my refining moments.

We may not understand the purpose behind every single heartache and painful trial, but we can learn to have faith that things will fall into place if we put our trust in Him. Let’s follow the admonition written in Psalms 46:10, “Be still, and know that I am God…” and consider everything that happens to us as a blessing, instead of burden.

Fixing That Which is Broken

 

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

For the past three weeks, my car’s dashboard was lighting up the “check engine” sign. I kind of ignored it the first couple of weeks, and I guess I was hoping it would just go away like all signs of flu. Hehe. But it didn’t.

As the days went by, my car didn’t function as well as it did before the warning sign appeared. It would sometimes jump for no reason or stall even if I was flooring the accelerator. Last Saturday, while I was cruising down the highway, the car choked and I finally had to have it fixed.

I know some of you would freak out and say that I should’ve had it fixed early on. I agree with you. And I offer no excuses for my procrastination. I shouldn’t have waited until the last moment and put my life on the line.

As I waited for hours for the car to be repaired yesterday, I realized that all things broken must be fixed. They will simply not get magically fixed, even if we ignore them or pretend that they don’t exist!

There are times when we get into situations in life where we choose to just turn a blind eye or not confront the situation for fear of the outcome. We sometimes hope that things will just go away like all flu symptoms. Now and then we tend to leave so many little things unsaid that we end up barely saying anything at all.

But I’ve experienced that there are a lot of instances when it’s best to gather enough courage and faith to make the necessary steps and correct the situation. Sometimes it takes humility on our part to put things right. And it pays to do the right thing! Always!

I’m glad that my car’s now fixed and I’ve learned my lesson. As we go through life, we should remember not to procrastinate fixing broken things and put our eternal life and happiness on the line.

Of Making Time and Starting Over

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

 

Do you work to live, or live to work??

 

I had a dream the other Saturday about a person whom I haven’t seen or talked to for ages. I was surprised to see him in my dream and immediately thought of getting in touch with him when I woke up the following morning. But a lot of things came up—as they usually do—that I didn’t get to touch base with him for a few more days.

 

When I finally did, I was excited that he replied right away, but at the same time felt a tinge of sadness and had to do some retrospection when he said “I am sure you have lots of things in your world to keep you distracted from contacting me over one dream. Your life is most likely as active as it always was.”

 

Ouch! There was a prick in my heart. Sometimes we get overly distracted by so many things that we fail to make time for those that are equally important. Every now and then we take for granted what’s available simply because we think it will always be there. But some things don’t last forever. And we might miss important moments in our lives if we get too distracted by the world.

 

When I visited this person’s blog before I sent him the email, I was surprised to see a blog entry he made especially for me on my birthday last year!! He remembered me on my birthday and I didn’t even get to see it until after several months. Can you imagine how guilty I felt after reading that?!

 

Yes, I was very guilty, but I always try to operate on hope of success rather than fear of failure. When I wake up in the morning, I always think that it is another day given to me by my Heavenly Father to start over and correct things that are amiss in my life. Just like what I heard yesterday from a talk given at the pulpit by a friend, we can become like diamonds through time even though right now we are just as charcoals.

 

So it IS another day! Another chance to start over. It is a beautiful day actually. It was drizzling and I love the rain, so for me it is perfect!

 

I hope that each of us would find time and make time for things that matter. I know that it can sometimes be a struggle, but I wish that we would try to live a balanced life so that we would be peaceful and be confident that we did the best we could with everything that has been entrusted to us when we finally draw our last breath.

Crucial Changes

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

Last weekend, my name was called by someone who looked very, very familiar. The lady approached me with such enthusiasm that one could tell we were old acquaintances who haven’t seen each other for a long time. At the end of the exchange of pleasantries though, I felt embarrassed that I still couldn’t even remember her name and where exactly we’ve met. But I didn’t have the courage to ask. Later that day, I realized why I couldn’t remember her. She had her nose fixed.

I must say that I felt kinda sad that she did that. I thought her original nose was pretty. I remember her as a very beautiful person, inside and out. But people have their reasons for doing the things they do and although I do not support such methods of physical change, I think some of our life’s changes are crucial for our happiness.

About a year ago, I had a friend who made a foolish and irresponsible action in life. She suffered the painful consequences of her wrong choice, but did all her best to cleanse herself of all its stains. As I see her now, I feel delighted that she was able to get back on the right track and regain the companionship of the Spirit. She testifies of the healing power of the Atonement and the peace that comes from being forgiven after proper repentance.

Another friend has been through a series of unpleasant encounters with the people she’s working with. She was constantly bothered by the stresses of her daily negative experiences in the workplace for a period of time. It saddened me to see her feeling gloomy every time she came from work. But despite the situation, I admire that she wrote down the names of those people on the temple prayer roll and regularly prayed for them. I think she became more cheerful since the day she decided to let go of any ill feelings towards the people involved, and let Him fix things for her. I have no doubt that one day things will get settled for her and her colleagues.

Change is the only constant thing, someone once said. I love how the weather changes through the seasons! I am amazed at how the leaves fall from the trees and display such vibrant colors in Autumn; how white and gray everything becomes in Winter; and how the same set of trees become bright and lively again in the Spring and Summer! Pretty much like life! We get our own set of Autumns and Winters, but we should always look ahead and keep in mind that just around the corner, we will always have Spring!

Seeking His Will

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

It’s funny how things turned out for me this week! I thought I was already feeling stressed about the multiple things that are simultaneously going on in my life, when apparently the One up there has a different perspective and draws up a completely distinct plan for me! Yikes!!! He gave me two additional things to do on top of the things I already have on my plate!!

Anyway, I am definitely NOT complaining! I totally appreciate the trust given me to serve in the capacity I was called to. I think it’s always a privilege to be “anxiously engaged in a good cause.” When we are faced with a challenge to do something that we think we’re incapable of accomplishing, He lends His hands, lifts us up, and makes us equal to the task at hand.

So, I look forward to this new and wonderful learning experience!! I know this will yet be another chance for me to grow in so many ways and beyond all my expectations!

Just the other week, I heard someone talked about how she dropped all her personal plans—which seemed to all fail no matter how hard she tried—and got down on her knees to ask Heavenly Father what His plans were for her. She was surprised at the initial impression she received. She even asked: “Is that what You really want me to do?” Eventually, she listened and acted upon the promptings and completed a mission that she never thought she would ever be able to fill.

I guess the bottom line is, when we align our lives with what Heavenly Father has planned for us, things fall into place and doors will open up because “He shall prepare a way for [us] that [we] may accomplish the thing which He [commanded us to do]!”

Wherever our paths may take us, I wish that we would all seek His plan, so that things will become easier for us and that we would be able to do things according to His will.

Opposition in All Things

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

Happy Mother’s Day!!! I hope that all the moms out there were pampered by their children the way I was today. Motherhood is such a noble calling and I’m grateful that I was given a chance to be a mom of two wonderful children here on earth! It’s one of the most difficult jobs in the world, but it’s also THE most rewarding experience! I just love it!  

Anyway, I had an interesting couple of weeks! I’ve experienced some real highs and lows that took me by surprise. Highs that allowed me to feel like I was on top of the world, soaring like an eagle; and lows that dragged me deep down the bottom of the pit that I couldn’t even write a short blog entry last week!

But I survived! YayYy!  

Through it all, I realized that we have been reminded in the scriptures that there must be opposition in all things! Whatever challenges we face are for our own benefit. We grow and expand our souls when we go through situations that test our patience and tolerance. We become more mature when we experience things that allow us to exercise our faith and humility. 

In one conversation that I had, I was being persuaded to act on some things that I really didn’t think mattered, so I refused to be stressed about it. The person that I was talking to had a different point of view and said that if he were in my situation he would “fight for it.” One lesson that I learned in my youth was that, “If it’s not for eternity, drop it.” I think this statement has helped me choose the kinds of stresses that I will allow to affect my life, and let go of those that I cannot control or don’t really matter. For the most part, relationship fallouts affect me more than anything else. I think relationships need our utmost attention especially when repairs need to be made, so we could have happy and healthy associations within our circle of influence.  

So, whatever challenges we are currently facing in our lives, let’s keep in mind that it is as normal as it gets! Opposition is a part of life that we must learn to accept. Our reaction to it is the only thing we can control. Either we take it head on with faith and courage, or we just simply drop it!

Have a fabulous Mother’s Day!!!
                                                            

Learning to Bite the Tongue

(Photograph by Franco Advincula)

 

When I was young, my mom used to tell me that I shouldn’t speak my mind all the time. That if I didn’t have anything nice to say, then I shouldn’t say anything at all. Being the eldest of a brood of five, it was one of the toughest things for me to do! Haha! J

 

Now as an adult, I realized that biting the tongue is a universal weakness. It is sometimes easier for people to criticize than to compliment. It takes a certain level of maturity, humility, and confidence to praise others because it would sometimes mean that they are better than them—and some people are just not comfortable with that. There are also times when expressing our strong emotions verbally during a heated moment can become a challenge.  

 

Throughout my life, as I’ve mingled with individuals of diverse social, racial, economic, and educational background, I’ve noticed that those who are in control of their strong emotions and are more generous in complimenting others are those who are happier and more grounded in their own lives. There seems to be a bucketful of optimism in their lives that they are more than willing to share. They light up the room when they’re around! J On the contrary, those who are oozing with negativity often live dark and bitter lives that, sadly, they unconsciously exhibit in most of their conversations.  

 

I don’t know if I will ever be perfect in terms of biting my tongue when necessary, but I find that it becomes easier as I keep practicing it! J Oh, and I’ve tried all sorts of techniques! J I tried pausing and thinking before saying anything; taking long, relaxed breaths; literally biting my tongue when angry; focusing on the positive than the negative; thinking about something completely different from the situation; keeping silent; ignoring the whole situation entirely; and the most difficult technique: asking myself what the Savior would do given the same situation! J

 

Most of us are a work in progress in this area, and I congratulate those who have already perfected this character trait! J I hope that someday I won’t have to make a conscious effort anymore when tempted to say something unkind or express my strong emotions when outraged.

 

Meanwhile, I’m taking my long, deep breaths calmly as I walk under the rain. J   

 

A Light to All the World

(Photograph by Franco Advincula)

 

I had a wonderful privilege of observing a 3-day youth conference last week. Not only did it remind me of how fantastic it is to be young and carefree, but I learned something from it that helped me choose the right path when I was put to a test over the weekend!

 

For this youth conference, a theme song was composed by a talented young composer which she taught the youth on their first day. The song goes:

 

 

There is a tiny spark in me;

I’ll make it grow for others to see.

My family and my Savior, I will not fail;

‘Though others may forget to walk the path that’s straight,

I will keep the faith.

 

In the darkness, I’ll be the light.

When others falter, I’ll be the guide.

When things are tough, I’ll choose the right.

I may be young, but I can choose,

To take the courage to live the truth.

 

I have been taught the gospel truths;

I will choose to live a righteous youth.

My family and my Savior, I will not fail;

‘Though others may forget to walk the path that’s straight,

I will keep the faith.

 

Born of royal birthright,

Trusted by the Lord,

To help build His kingdom,

A light to all the world.

 

(Music and Lyrics by Diana Valencia Cruz)

 

 

How grateful I am that I listened to the melody and words of the song as they practiced singing it over and over!! Because that weekend I was tempted to act irresponsibly in reaction to another person’s conduct. I went to bed contemplating rebellious thoughts that must’ve been displeasing to our Father’s eyes. So I was really amused when in the middle of the night I suddenly woke up with the tune and words of the song filling my mind:

 

“In the darkness, I’ll be the light.

When others falter, I’ll be the guide.”

 

I didn’t catch up on my sleep after that, but it was a humbling moment for me to be chastened by the Lord in such a sweet and gentle way! J  Needless to say, I immediately got my act together and chose the right thing to do the following day!! J

 

I know, without a shadow of doubt, that we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father who loves us despite our weaknesses and shortcomings. I am a living proof of that tender mercy. He is there watching over us even when we falter—yes, especially when we falter! And just as the song says, may we always keep in mind that we are of royal birthright! That we can choose the right even when things are tough, and that our tiny spark of light may be used as a guide by those who are in the darkness—indeed, a light to all the world!!! J

Finding Peace in the Storm

 

 

Happy Easter everybody!!! J

 

My heart rejoiced at the messages I’ve heard during the general conference! I found it especially remarkable that the speakers talked about things that we could use to combat the challenges of our time—even the financial crisis that’s going on across the world right now! J

 

It was comforting to note that the general authorities have spoken, not only about the spiritual well-being of those within the sound of their voices, but about their temporal welfare as well. It gave me assurance that Heavenly Father is mindful of our current situation on earth and is willing to extend His loving guidance so that we mortals could prepare and overcome whatever lies ahead. J

 

I remember a story that was once told of a painting competition where the theme was about peace. Many artists joined the contest and worked on their individual masterpieces. They sent in their paintings as soon as they were completed and each artist anxiously awaited the day when the winning painting would be revealed. Each hoped that it would be his entry.

 

On the day of judgment, all the paintings were displayed in a large exhibit hall where spectators could view them, except for one—the winning painting—which was covered with white cloth. The numerous entries demonstrated the different artists’ interpretations of peace.  

 

When the winning painting was finally unveiled, a hushed murmur was heard across the room. One artist raised his voice and complained that the winning painting was not about peace because all he could see was a depiction of a storm, with trees swayed by the strong wind, leaves blown out of their branches, a heavy downpour, and a small wooden house that seemed to barely stand the rainfall. 

 

One of the judges invited this complaining artist to take a closer look. When the artist approached the winning painting, he noticed at the corner of the painting was a bird’s nest on a tree with young birds sleeping as their mother watched over. He then realized that this winning painting indeed portrayed the real meaning of peace, for peace does not depend on external circumstances; it is a state of calm and serenity that is felt from within—no matter how troubled the surroundings may be.

 

As we go through the challenges of our time, may we be reminded of this humble story of what real peace is all about. May we have enough for our needs and may we rely on Him who created everything on this earth to grant us “peace that passeth all understanding.” The kind of peace that will comfort us amidst the raging storms of life and help us endure until we are finished with our work on this earth. J

The Best Policy

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

 

I was talking with my son on the phone last week as I headed home from the grocery, when he suddenly interrupted me and said:

 

“Mom, I’m sorry, I accidentally broke the shower.”

 

Screeeeeccchhh! My mind’s switch from the grocery-related train of thoughts to the broken shower was amazing. J

 

Shower…Broken…How broken? My mind tried to process those thoughts.

 

As I listened to him explain what happened, I felt like I had that conversation with him before. Only it was over a broken door that he kicked out of frustration when he got hurt during a basketball game that their team lost; or a broken chair that he and two of his friends sat on at the same time and collapsed; or the head of one of the shepherds in our nativity set coming off; and many more.

 

Yet no matter how many times we’ve had those broken-things-conversations in the past, I highly appreciate his honesty and courage in coming forward and volunteering the information every single time. I suppose there was an instance when he was younger when I told him I would always prefer honesty than half-truths or white lies. And to this day, he held on to that statement and I’ve grown a lot in terms of restraining myself from getting angry whenever he breaks things “accidentally.” J

 

Whether over broken things or matters of greater weight, I believe that honesty is still the best policy. There are times when we may be tempted to be dishonest for many reasons, but I know that being honest will be much more appreciated in almost all situations as we do so in sincerity.

 

So let’s strive to be more honest with what we say and do. Let us carefully keep and honor our words and watch our actions. I know that when we are honest, we will not only gain the trust of people around us, but we will keep our self-respect and integrity intact as well. J

Modern Miracles

 

When I was in college, my parents gave me allowance on Mondays that I needed to budget for the rest of the week. Although the money was usually enough to pay for my tithing, meals, transportation, and other school expenses, there was one particular Friday afternoon when my budget fell short. That experience taught me a lesson I will always remember for the rest of my life. J

 

I was on my way home that day, joining the crowd of people who were trying to get a public transportation ride during the rush hour. As I reached in my pocket, I became concerned when I saw that the money left for my fare home was lacking 25 centavos.

 

Many thoughts came to my mind. I considered the possibility of walking home, although it would have taken me hours to do that and I was already very tired. I also thought of talking to the driver and letting him know my situation, although it would have been very embarrassing and I might have been asked to get off. In desperation, it even crossed my mind to just give what I had and see if the driver would say anything about it.

 

But I’m grateful that at such a young age, I was taught correct principles of honesty and faith. J

 

Amidst the rushing thoughts and hurrying crowd, I said a sincere prayer in my heart. I asked Heavenly Father to help me know what to do. Seconds after that prayer, I couldn’t believe my eyes and had to suddenly stop walking! There was a shiny 25-centavo coin on the pavement right in front of me!!! J

 

My heart leaped as I picked it up knowing that a loving Father had heard and answered my prayer almost instantly!! Some would probably say that it was a coincidence, but I think not. From that day on, I knew without a shadow of doubt that our prayers—no matter how insignificant they may seem to us—matter to Him who loves us beyond our comprehension! J

 

I’ve seen a lot of these modern miracles occur over the years in my life and in the lives of others. I’ve witnessed how people became instruments in making eternal things happen; how simple, heartfelt prayers are heard and answered almost instantly; how individuals are comforted and strengthened to bear the burdens that are placed upon their shoulders! J  

 

Let’s look around us and acknowledge these things! J Because I know from the bottom of my heart, that even in this day and age, miracles still do happen!! J

Charity Never Faileth

    

Human kindness was overflowing. The invisible divide between the affluent and the needy was banished by the sincere desire to serve however little way they could. Helping hands were extended and misery a bit lifted. My heart swelled at the avalanche of yellow-vested volunteers pouring down the hallway to offer relief to their fellow beings that at one point during an interview, I had to fight back the tears from falling.

 

In commemoration of the 167^th Relief Society Anniversary worldwide, our ward conducted an unprecedented medical mission led by a set of novice servants who relied mostly on Heavenly Father’s help in order to put together what was required of them in the very limited span of time they were given. I’ve witnessed how often they got down on their knees to plead for help and guidance. How hard and late they worked to connect to the right people and tap the proper resources. How they quietly placed their trust in Him whose hands were felt in every way opening doors for them that they may accomplish the thing which He had asked them to do.

 

And by His hands, miracles happened.

 

There is no sweeter joy than that which comes from lifting another soul on higher ground! And there is no other way to know how it feels like than through experiencing it! J

 

“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 5:16).

 

Whether we are trying to make a difference in someone’s life quietly or participating in large community service projects such as these, let us serve with all our heart, might, mind, and strength so that our efforts may be acceptable to Him and our endeavors may be blessed by His hands. J

Of Infinite Worth

(Photograph by Edwin Redrino)

 

My heart was touched at the gesture of a fine young lady as she gently stroked the back of her older brother who was a special child. One could feel the genuine love she had for him and the sincere affection her brother must have felt in his heart for her action.

 

Most people tend to walk away from special people—either afraid or confused on how to react—but this young woman’s pure display of affection demonstrated to me what it means to have unconditional love. I felt a tremendous amount of respect for her and a tinge of sadness in my heart for I was once given a chance to handle a similar situation, but wasn’t able to respond the way she did. L

 

Later that day, it felt heartwarming to listen to her and my children sing a beautiful song about an individual’s worth. The first part of the song goes:

 

“All I need do is remember,

If ever I wonder if I am of worth,

Remember my Savior; what He did for me,

When He walked among men on this earth.

 

“Pain and unspeakable sorrow,

He bore for my sins there, in Gethsemane,

Then He gave up His life as He hung on the cross

And He did it all for me.

 

“For I am of worth, of infinite worth,

My Savior, Redeemer loves me.

Yes, I am of worth, of infinite worth,

I’ll be what He wants me to be.

 

“I will praise Him, I will serve Him,

I will grow in His love

And fulfill my divine destiny…”

 

(“I Walk By Faith Songbook,” by Janice Kapp Perry & Joy Saunders Lundberg)

 

 

Such a divine knowledge that we are all of infinite worth! J Yes, and perhaps even more so for special people around us! And although we may not know the answer to all the whys we have in this world, I trust that someday we will—and I so look forward to it! J